Du kan ikke fortælle spillerne uden et scorecard>How I Met Clean Boys>Chapter 13

Before I go any further, I feel you should get to know the cast of characters along the way, at least thus far and who will show up in the next set of chapters. Not that you don’t know them already, but from my standpoint, it certainly will help you understand them a bit better. Besides, you just can’t tell a player without a scorecard, now can you?

Pedro Da Palma-bassist, lead throat and tour organizer>He’s the one person I stayed in contact with most, from the early days upon when we first met through YouTube all the way through now in person, here in Aarhus. He’s the one that did a lot of the footwork for setting up shows and interpreting & relaying messages back and forth between venues, band members and kept us all at an even-keel, for the most part. His disposition is a pleasant demeanor and truly one of the calmest Danes I ever have gotten to know.

Jacob Mulle Nansen-drummer and backing vocals>I did a lot a Skyping with him in the many months leading up to the tour and we had a lot of great conversations, so I thought. Took in a lot of background, learned a bit of language, learned a lot about the Clean Boys. Overall, his disposition can be a little rough around the edges and slightly abrupt, but what drummer isn’t?

Andrzej Morks-guitarist & backing vocals-family man, jazz guy, father of two daughters, but perhaps the most practical of them all, perhaps in terms of ideals. One of the most diverse guys I had met yet, but also one of the hardest drinkers and heaviest smokers I have ever known (apart from Pedro and Mulle)! And one of those guys that you’d want to get to know, especially at a party and there was certainly a lot of that going on in the early days before the actual tour began!

Kasper Hayes (AKA Baconslap Hayes)-when introduced to me, he called himself, “The Roadie From Hell,” the guy who “promised” to drink all your beer, take all your women and eat all your food. Took me a bit to get used to him, to grow on me, but a real gentleman in every sense of the word.

Karsten Lund-our tour driver. He drove the camper van for the lot of our tour, with the exception of Mulle a few times, but again the majority fell into the responsible hands of Karsten. Karsten taught me a few Danish customs, kept me from being arrested in Germany (but that comes later in the story), has the coolest Hammond B3-organ, works at a cool school and like Kasper, a true gentleman and a big, big heart of gold.

Cisco Gulløve-Safari Freakshow Adventure “official” photographer and temporary transplant from Brazil. Upon meeting him, his first words out of his mouth, were “US Bluff,” which translated into the United States is full of shit; not exactly a warm welcome to Denmark from him, no in fact, the tee shirt he wore to welcome me with, was one worthy that only a criminal mind could pull off. Outside of that, he was a friendly and frugally practical man.

Den Sorte Fane-friend to Clean Boys and a few others I met in the early days of the tour; a Food Not Bombs organizer, local Aarhus activist, especially May Day, punk rocker-also a hater/basher of the United States, but outside of that, he was truly a friendly guy!

Estrid Balslev-what can I not say about Estrid? Intense brilliant Danish performance artist who truly gave a damn about what she was doing in her work and made it work so others like myself who were “foreign,” got it pretty rapidly. Before, I flew over to Denmark, I studied Estrid extensively and intensely, mainly on YouTube, though I didn’t speak Danish, I watched the films she was in and was fascinated by her enunciation and movement. I kept up a correspondence with her shortly before I arrived, upon the suggestion of Pedro (I believe). She turned out to be a great friend and felt like a 2^nd mother to me (other than my own) and when we met, I felt the connection, almost instantly-a little cliché, I suppose, but it was true nonetheless.

Vitawrapmand (AKA Michael Persson)-poet and performance artist, the guy who wore more sausage in strategic and sensitive places on his body than I could ever consume on the whole of the tour! Wrapped himself up in Vita Wrap (Danish version of America’s cellophane), shrieked through a bullhorn with often hilarious witticisms and poetry. Danced and performed and made music with a female vinyl blow-up doll. Also the guy who published poems of mine in his collective Danish quarterly poetry magazine. Slam-danced & moshed with me the whole of the tour. All-around nice guy.

Frede Nielsen-Safari Freakshow Adventure record producer and funny guy-three days younger than my brother Benjy. Produced and engineered a few of the shows on the tour, specifically in Horsens and Viborg.