Disclaimer: Take from the church the miraculous, the supernatural, the incomprehensible, the unreasonable, the impossible, the unknowable, and the absurd, and nothing but a vacuum remains. Fiction can be that way sometimes. Any similarities to persons living or dead is purely conincidental & should not be taken or misconstrued as such. Anyone who thinks otherwise, probably believes that to wage a war for a purely moral reason is as absurd as to ravish a woman for a purely moral reason.Hurry, hurry, hurry! Gather ‘round boys and girls, Moms and Dads of all ages and feast your eyes on the death-defying man known as The Minister Of Sinister! Talk about your survival of the fittest! Talk about your dead man walking! It seems too good to be true, but yes; The Minister Of Sinister has escaped the jaws of death once more!
Those of us who have been on deathwatch in the past knew an execution was up and coming shortly of another beloved inmate here on Devil’s Island. The plan to execute The Minister Of Sinister had been planned out for days, perhaps even weeks in advance, but when it came right down to the nuts and bolts of the matter at hand, those in charge had once again failed miserably.
Nearly one week ago the pleas for giving him a full pardon had once again gone on deaf ears and so the execution was set in motion to occur again. Word of his impending execution spread like wildfire across Devil’s Island and soon, into the furious night there came a great shit storm of anger and discontent; a discontent so powerful and destructive that even those taking over temporary duties here on Devil’s Island (see Act 16) could not stop.
No one truly knows who was behind his execution request, although according to Danceman Darryl, he felt it seemed to fall into the lap of The Most Holy Father, who has taken over where Upper Prison Brass have left off.
I had met The Minister Of Sinister on the outside of Devil’s Island years ago, he was in all of my recollections a funny, sweet, caring man, but then again I knew there was another side of him I was about to find out, a dark secret that only few knew.
At last when I was brought in for interrogation and questioning onto Devil’s Island, I stood alone and silent in my pinstripe suit and patent leather shoes with enough money to buy a jam sandwich, a lottery ticket and a pack of condoms filling my pockets. It was when I saw The Minister Of Sinister once more; I knew I was in what I thought seemingly friendly territory.
But like so many others, I was wrong.
What brought The Minister Of Sinister to Devil’s Island years ago was his ability to escape the reality of situations and bring it within himself to his advantages; that’s where he tripped up and landed himself for a long stay on Devil’s Island until he dramatically escaped one night after a lights out check within the confines of Devil’s Island.
It was only within the last year that The Barnaby Boys were able to track him with the help of newly developed Devil’s Island sonar detection equipment to his whereabouts and brought him back to serve the rest of his time on Devil’s Island.
Previously, there had been talk around Devil’s Island for the last few months as to whether both The Minister Of Sinister & Roger Dogma would be executed together like a circus freak show, executed separately or be spared, no one knew for certain (see Act Six).
When told of his pending execution, The Minister Of Sinister seemed proud of his model behavior here on Devil’s Island and whistled himself a tune onto the brink of happiness. Inside his eyes however, told a different story altogether. Within his eyes one could see that once again the noose around his neck had been retightened after being unseen or unheard from within the normal reaches of the prisoner population for many weeks. Though he remained silent on the matter his voice remained ever stronger than before.
He kept his distance from the general population and did whatever he was supposed to do, for whatever it took to keep him strong and solid. Things were quiet around the prison yard whenever he ambled his way out, but in the many weeks and months that passed, The Minister Of Sinister primarily kept to himself.
But then things changed. Plans were bumped up faster than they should have been and soon the wheels were set in motion. Many a prisoner could feel it in the air, for it hung heavy like cheap perfume splashed onto the fur coat of the late Old Black Devil.
When The Most Holy Father sent for The Minister Of Sinister, he brought in his most reliable crew of dirty birds, the inevitable duo that consisted of The Barnaby Boys, who placed him in cuffs and shackles and lead him down the prison walkway for what was supposed to be his “last mile.”
Along the route other prisoners waved toward him with long faces, to which he responded, “Do not fear, for we shall meet each other on the other side” and marched forward. The Minister Of Sinister was extremely calm for a man who was about to be executed.
But as previously stated he had been this route before and laughed in the face of death and all its atrocities; he had seen it all, heard it all and mostly importantly, lived through the hard times on the outside and the especially on the inside.
So whence came last Friday, when The Most Holy Father flipped on the execution switch and every prisoner feared the worst, but The Minister Of Sinister, although fried and burned to a near golden brown like a stack of waffles, survived and lived to tell about it.
And that’s a true rarity indeed.
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