Suite For Furby On Slide-Whistle In D Minor: How The Concept Came About

It’s been a long time since I’ve performed functionally, either as a duo, trio, quartet or group performance, but that changed this past summer. I hooked up with a friend and co-worker of mine, Twitchy and together we’ve done a few performances together, primarily it’s been him backing me up on a few poems and the like.

At my workplace, a series of performances were held entitled “West Lawn Concerts,” and although they weren’t concerts per say, it was individuals like me coming out to perform.

I performed a few times, but it was mostly to an uneducated and close-minded group of office workers who are more than likely used to hearing conventional music and poetry performances.

I got the feeling that I wasn’t appreciated and yes, I realize this does sound like a “feel-sorry for me” ploy, but, no it was absolutely true. The only way to gage an audience was to “listen” to their eyes and face movements, which half the time seemed like a big question mark over their heads.

I never really like performing in this sort of venue to begin with, but I did it as a favor to the two hosts that were running the show. Even after I said I would not perform again, one of the hosts would constantly pressure me into performing when she couldn’t find anyone else to perform.

I gave her a plethora of names and told her to go ask them. She did and nearly 99 percent of those individuals were on the same playing level with me; they saw no reason to perform whatsoever either because of lack of self confidence or just no desire to perform in front of fellow co-workers.

There were a few individuals, however, that did appease the audience; Danceman Daryl for example played nothing but Beatles, Bob Dylan & Elvis Costello cover tunes, playing out his heart and soul. He was enthusiastic, yet as green as a newborn baby, in that his stage presence was anything but seasoned.

He enjoyed the amounts of applause and positive response he received, but when it came right down to it, he didn’t realize that the audience was using him for their own benefit, which was of course the boring old mantra; “I’m here, I work hard, entertain me!” They didn’t seem to care one bit, oh no! Sure they requested cover tunes and the like, but they wanted to be entertained whole-heartedly. I’m not sure Daryl realized it or not, but he ended up “retiring” from performing for audiences after taking part in this venue. Strange, huh?

It was late in August when I did my last performance for the series, but it took a lot of convincing for me to do it. I already hated my audience for not being sincere about their tastes and open-mindedness of art, performance, music & poetry.

So, I decided on performing something else. Something maddening. Something different. Something they never had ever seen in their lifetime and probably would never see again if they chose to, only because close-mindedness is often catching. It often leads to apathy, a common disease among human beings these days.

I hatched an idea with Twitchy to perform for my Furbies, while ignoring the crowd. The idea/concept seemed simple enough; we laughed about it one night and then put the wheels into motion. We passed the word among other co-workers we knew who understood what we were doing that we were going to perform.

The day of the performance I brought to work the essentials; four Furbies and instruments that included bugle, African thumb piano, harmonica a few other assorted musical gadgets, as well as the main instruments, the slide-whistle.

We made prior arrangements with the hostess of the series to “interrupt” her performance of a Simon & Garfunkel tune on flute, as Twitchy just walked up to her in the middle of her performance and started to ring a school bell, while I opened up a duffel bag that contained the instruments and a mini-cooler which housed the Furbies.

I unloaded the bags and placed the Furbies on a plastic table. I took the instruments out and placed them on the ground, three for him, three for me. Twitchy kept ringing the bell until I instructed him to stop.

Then I held up several placards instead of speaking. I let a member of the audience speak for us, mainly reading the words aloud. I watched the audience slightly as I reached for my slide-whistle and began to blow. Both Twitchy and I blew on our slide-whistles, him more traditional, while I played more in avant-garde like.

After what seemed like several minutes, I picked up my rusted & bent bugle and began to blow, while Twitchy picked up the harmonica and blew out a few notes. The audience from when I looked up from time to time had grown exceedingly larger or perhaps I was imagining it all, but when I did look up slightly, it was only to acknowledge Twitchy or the Furbies.

Then we switched over to African thumb piano (me) and pair of claves (Twitchy). The Furbies were still talking for the most part, although it looked as if two “had died,” so Twitchy picked them up and smashed them down on the table furiously to get them moving again; they did to some degree.

After that, we switched back to slide-whistle for the final few minutes. Twitchy eventually stopped and then I followed suit. I then held out the placard that read “The End.” We bowed I think and we got a “polite response,” mostly by people trying to figure out what we just did.

This Saturday, October 22, from 8:30-9:30pm we’ll be doing the same piece, only this time, a whole hour! Can’t wait to test out the new instruments and other noisemakers I’m bringing with me. We’re performing under the name Tribal Screen Hens, at "Sconefest," a celebration of the scone biscuit. It’s being held at Pick-A-Cup, 1813 Dempster St, in Evanston. The event itself is free, so feel to crash the performance and join in!

Just think; Saturday night is our first real gig. We perform in another three weeks at Phyllis’ Musical Inn in Chicago on November 10 at 9:30pm for the Flabby Hoffman Show.

Boy, oh boy! I can’t wait until Twitchy & I hit Las Vegas!